Culture / People

A non-definitive ranking of our favourite daddies of the internet

The internet can be a somewhat feral and chaotic cesspool of trending memes, tag lines, fashions and celebrity gossip, but every now and then it throws up a particularly humorous and nuanced new trend that we can get behind. Insert: daddies of the internet.

What are internet daddies you might ask? The requirements to be an internet daddy – or 'zaddy' if you will – are simple: a distinguished and attractive person, usually older, with sharp fashion sense and an indistinguishable charm. They do not, ironically, have to be a father to qualify. Though the Venn Diagram of celebrity dads and internet dads do, often, overlap.

The term's increasing use in popular culture has seen it transcend niche internet language to be adopted amongst well-known daddies of the internet themselves – some now gingerly aware of their title, others proudly reclaiming their status.

However democratically elected, the RUSSH team have their own thoughts on who ranks most highly in this exclusive club. And true to form, we're here to let you know our thoughts on this very serious, not at all frivolous matter. And so, please enjoy below our non-definitive but very rigorously compiled ranking of our favourite daddies of the internet.


1. Pedro Pascal


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Of course we had to start this list with the obvious, and that means starting with Pedro Pascal. He's fast become the internet's most adored on-screen father figure – to Ellie in HBO's The Last of Us, or to Grogu in Disney's The Mandalorian. And honestly, we're not sure if anybody loves Pedro Pascal being our chaotic internet daddy more than the man himself.


2. Paul Mescal


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If you weren't privvy to the absolute emotional devastation of A24's Aftersun, then that's probably a good thing. But if you were, then you know that Paul Mescal makes for a most endearing young dad. Hence his inclusion on this list.


3. Stanley Tucci


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We were among many teenagers who watched Easy A only to leave the cinema thinking about how damn COOL Olive Penderghast's parents were. And if you've seen his cooking show in the years since, then you know we're doubling down on Tucci's inclusion here. We'd have a fatherly, bespectacled Stanley Tucci cook us eggplant pasta or stir us up a Negroni any day of the week.


4. Jeff Goldblum


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Another list addition we don't feel we have to explain. Jurassic Park was where Goldblum's trajectory into zaddy-dom began. But really his nomination on this list has got less to do with how he is with on-screen children, and more to do with his rugged, eclectic charm. Extra points for his inclusion in the Miuccia-verse in Prada's Mens AW 22 campaign.


5. Idris Elba

Elba gets bonus points for the British accent, but he's also on this list because he's simply universally adored by the internet. Whether he's playing an actual father in Daddy's Little Girls, or simply taking charge in the recent Hijack series, he's consistently bringing the daddy vibes.


6. Ryan Reynolds


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As a father to three girls, Ryan Reynolds gives big girl dad energy that we're here for. We loved him in Deadpool. We love his wife, Blake Lively. He wears cardigans, and goes to football games. He also has a great sense of humour. Check, check, check. It's simple, really.


7. Jason Momoa


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If he's good enough to be Zoe Kravitz's step-dad, then he's good enough for us.


8. John Stamos


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There's just something about John Stamos that screams father figure energy to us – or maybe more accurately, fun uncle energy. Sure, we'll overlook his days on GLEE, but it has not done much to drop him down the ranks.


9. Lenny Kravitz


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We could write a thesis on this one, but we won't. If you've watched Kravitz's Architectural Digest tour of his Brazilian Farm Compound, then you understand. If you know, you know.


10. George Clooney

What kind of list would this be without the inclusion of the original silver-haired fox himself, Mr George Clooney. From his soap days on the set of E.R. to his now bonafide movie-stardom status, Clooney has always embodied the qualities of a great 'daddy of the internet' – even becoming a dad to twins himself with with Amal Clooney in 2017.


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Images: one, two, three, four, five, six.